Bittersweet Heat
by CounterKnight291543
Summary: It's been two years since the end of the dimensional war. Sora and the rest of the lancers have left their old lives behind them and are living in peace in the Standard Dimension. But for Sora, the world has become a lonely place. Apart from Yuya Sakaki, his housemate, he has no-one. Sora is determined to rid his heart of the soul-crushing loneliness that starts to consume him.
1. Prologue

Chapter 1: Prologue

The war was over. Leo Akaba and his army of Fusion miscreants had finally been defeated. In the ruins of Academia, atop the rubble of this once impenetrable fortress had stood the Lancers, the elite group of duelists responsible for bringing peace not just to the fusion dimension, but to all dimensions. It had been difficult at first, with the Xyz dimension needing to be rebuilt from the ground up. The war had ravaged the once sprawling metropolis that was Heartland City to the point where it had simply become a husk, a hollow shell in which even the hardiest of creatures could not find its home. And yet, this shell remained a symbol of a new beginning to its former inhabitants, who all maintained a strong desire to restore it to its former glory. They vowed to reclaim their city from the fire and dust that had enveloped it, and that's exactly what they had begun to do.

However, after a war that had caused such intense and widespread suffering, reconstruction was never going to be as simple as rebuilding houses and social infrastructure. All this restoration and work meant nothing without people. After all, what are homes if there is no-one to inhabit them? What is a city without its citizens? This sentiment was shared across the dimensions, uniting those of the Synchro, Xyz and Standard dimensions behind a policy of amnesty and forgiveness towards those of the Fusion dimension. Such a policy would allow a new world to rise from the ashes of Academia, free from the chains of oppression that had bound its indoctrinated populous for so long. Nevertheless, for the communities of this tortured dimension, rehabilitation was always the biggest concern, but even this was only the first step in healing the damage done by the Professor.

Accepting change was the next. Whereas change had only begun to flourish for the Fusion dimension in the immediate aftermath of the war, it had already set its roots firmly in the Synchro dimension, with a revolution sweeping the city of New Domino within weeks of the Lancers' arrival. The revolution spread across the city like a tidal wave, a raging torrent of animosity and resentment consuming the hearts of the Commons that cried out to be liberated. This deluge of ill feeling towards the Topsiders threatened to flood the entire city with hate and misery, until a single duel changed it all. This duel brought smiles to both Topsiders and Commons alike, convincing them to lay down their arms and cooperate with one another. With this cooperation, the harsh nature of their world became clear. Their survival, and the survival of everything in it, was dependent on their ability to co-exist together in peace.

Of course, peace on a dimensional scale was much harder to achieve. This task again fell to the Lancers of the Standard dimension, just as it had done during the war. Through their unyielding tenacity and their unwavering compassion, each dimension underwent a complete change not unlike a caterpillar's transformation into a butterfly. At first, these worlds were weak and vulnerable, but within two years they had emerged anew, born again with radiant wings emblazoned with the lasting achievements of the Lancers: Compassion, forgiveness, tolerance… and peace.

And so, with peace achieved and the reconstruction of dimensions all but completed, the Lancers left their old lives behind. They left behind the despair, the anguish, the grief… and the heartache.

…Or at least that's what Sora had hoped.


	2. Numb

Chapter 2: Numb

Sora lay alone in his bed trying again and again to recall what chores he'd been assigned for the week. Was it washing the dishes and feeding the dogs? Or was it buying groceries? Or was it his turn to help with making dinner? Most days he could never remember, and today was certainly no exception. He rolled over onto his right side before letting out a stifled yawn. From here he could see all around the room.

His room.

Sora shut his eyes as tightly as he could, trying to block out both the light piercing through the curtains and the negative thoughts that were beginning to swirl through his mind.

Even after two years it still felt almost alien to him to describe this space in which he lived as his room. During the war, Sora had no room. Hell, he didn't even have a home. He had nothing. Just his deck, his duel disk and of course, his grit. This had always been his most valuable asset given the world from which he came. A world in which the only thing that really mattered was the strength of your character. Having fought on both sides of the war, he knew this all too well. He was strong. He always had been. He had to be.

But how many had thought the same and fallen nonetheless? It didn't matter which dimension you came from, or fought for, if you were not strong enough you didn't survive. It was as simple as that. The only true equaliser the war could offer for both sides was even simpler, death.

Sora shuddered and rolled over again to this time face the wall, trying desperately to shake the chilling feeling that was starting to creep its way down his spine. It was a feeling he was all too familiar with.

Fear.

But this wasn't a fear of the past, of the Professor, of the war. This was a fear of the future, of what was to come. For two years he had ghosted through life, dedicating all his time and energy to fervently helping those he had originally fought against. He had never once even stopped to think about himself and his own feelings. Now he had begun to do so, was fear really all he felt?

No. It was something else. Something deeper than that. This fear for his future was being manifested by another emotion, he just couldn't decipher what it was. Frankly, he didn't want to know what it was given how it was making him feel.

Sora violently rolled over for a final time, back onto his right side. He took a deep breath and opened his glistening green eyes as wide as he could, trying to take in every minute detail of his dimly lit room. It was small, yet spacious with little furniture besides the bed he currently lay in and the narrow wardrobe at the foot of his bed. Even though Sora couldn't see it from this position, he could feel the wardrobe bearing down on him, casting a weak but judging shadow across his lower body.

He should have given the damn thing to Yuya the day he moved in he thought to himself, pulling the scrunched-up duvet tighter around his shoulders whilst unwittingly exposing his lower half even further. He could never have brought himself to do it however. It was simply too beautiful. The intricate design of dragons and flowers that adorned its camphor wood framework made it quite a spectacle when seen from the doorway, a stark contrast to the rest of his room.

Sora's emerald eyes began to scan the space around him, darting between the few comforts that he'd come to rely on over the last two years. To the right of the doorway stood a small TV on a glass stand, with an old Nintendo Wii perched beside it. To the left lay his collection of stuffed animals and toys, the buying of which was a habit he just couldn't seem to break. The only other furnishing in his room was a small bedside table and drawer where he kept his deck. Atop the table sat a lone photograph inside a basic black frame. Sora glanced over at it, his heart sinking as he remembered what it was.

It was a photo of the Lancers outside a bowling alley close by to the You Show Duel School, taken just after the war had been won. Sora pushed an arm through his duvet and grabbed the photo, pulling it closer so he could make out the individual faces of everyone there.

He carefully inspected the photo, searching the faces of everyone in it for the emotions they carried. Yuya, Yuto, Reiji… Hell even Yuri had shown up. Sora remembered being too scared to go with them, not because he was afraid they wouldn't accept him, but because the war had taught him to not put his trust in anyone but himself. And look where that had got him. Besides Yuya, did he have any real friends? Any relationships that went further than an awkward hello?

Sora could feel the fear in him rising again, but this time it was different. This photo had finally made him realise what was making him so afraid. How did he not realise sooner? The answer had literally been sat on his bedside table the whole time. He could at last put a name to the raw emotion that had been slowly eating away at his soul for so long.

Loneliness.

He had almost no-one. In the two years since the war, everyone had made friends, forged relationships and become a family. Sora was alone.

Tears began to form in his eyes and before long they were rolling down his rounded cheeks, dripping onto the glass of the frame when his chin couldn't hold onto the drops any longer. He painfully tore his eyes away from the photo. He couldn't bear to see their cheerful expressions any longer.

Wait. Something in the back of his mind made him look back the picture in front of him. He wiped away the tears that stained the glass cover before scrutinising the photo even closer. Everyone appeared happy and content, except one person.

Shun Kurosaki.

Sora stared at the boy's face for what seemed like an eternity with questions circling his mind. Why is he the only one not smiling? Could he be like Sora in that the war had changed him to the point where he struggled to cultivate relationships? Sora felt a wave of new feelings wash over him. Could Shun have become just like him? His mind was racing from the possibility that someone could relate to him. However, he was once again struggling to comprehend these feelings that were stirring within him. They were all so new to him. Despite the confusion, one thing was for certain. This boy, Shun Kurosaki, was giving him hope.

Sora was so focused on trying to understand his new emotions that he didn't hear a loud knock on the door and a voice on the other side. Before he knew what was happening, Yuya burst in through the door making Sora drop the photo with a startled yelp.

"Sora it's really late how aren't you-" Yuya stopped himself mid-sentence as his eyes adjusted to the dim light, only realising that Sora wasn't dressed when it was far too late. He instinctively threw his arms up and hid his face behind the palms of his hands. "Could you please put some clothes on!" he yelled, trying his best not to catch a glimpse of Sora's half naked body through the gaps between his fingers.

Sora could only stare back in a state of shock and horror. He hadn't realised how far he'd pulled the duvet up when he was trying in vain to escape his demons. "Sorry Yuya, I didn't realise how late it was," he confessed, giving the clock an accusatory glare as he pulled on a pair of his red boxers.

"It's fine, but maybe you should consider investing in an alarm clock someday," he laughed, before checking that Sora was decent and yanking the curtains open to a flood of white light. "Hey are you okay? You look kinda upset," he remarked, noticing how red and puffy Sora's eyes appeared to be.

Sora flinched slightly, forcing him to take a deep breath and lay back on his bed as his fears came flooding back to him all at once. He'd forgotten how much he'd been crying. But he had to play this cool, Yuya could never find out what he was going through. "Yeah yeah I'm fine, I had trouble sleeping though."

"Ah no wonder you were so tired," Yuya exclaimed. "Maybe a new bed too then perhaps?"

Sora let out a small sigh of relief, his mind at ease knowing that Yuya was none the wiser to his problems. He calmly walked towards his closet to get his clothes for the day, leaving Yuya stood idly in the middle of his room. "So, what is it that was so urgent anyways?" he asked, his voice slightly muffled by the black t-shirt he was pulling over his head.

There was no reply, but he could hear Yuya fumbling with something on the floor behind him.

The photo.

Sora felt his stomach twist and tighten into a thousand knots. If Yuya's holding what he thinks he's holding, he was done for. Yuya would know for sure what had actually been bothering him, there would be no denying it. He wasn't ready for this. He couldn't have Yuya worrying about him now. Sora knew he would pour every ounce of his being into helping him, fretting over him… pitying him. He couldn't allow himself to become a burden to his only friend.

Sora tentatively turned around, praying that Yuya had just picked up one of his stuffed toys maybe. To his complete and utter dismay, there was Yuya delicately holding the picture in both his hands, cradling it just as Sora had done. There was a not-so subtle difference in how Yuya held it though. Whereas Sora had clutched at the frame's corners with a vice-like grip that only served to add to his pain, Yuya handled it with a warmth that reflected the love and contentment he felt towards those in the photograph. He looked as though he cherished it as if it was his own, just as he cherished the memory that was captured so perfectly within the frame's tattered black walls.

He was grinning incessantly, clearly recalling the antics he and his friends had gotten up to that day. He slowly looked up, his grin changing to a tender and heartfelt smile that oozed so much warmth Sora was tempted to run over and hug him. "This was such an amazing day," Yuya explained excitedly. "I just wish you'd have been there too."

Sora could only stare at the floor. He could feel the hot prick of tears beginning to form in his eyes as he became increasingly overwhelmed by a slew of negative emotions. Sorrow. Shame. Guilt. Was he destined to live the rest of his life in a state of perpetual loneliness?

"So do I…" he mumbled quietly with his gaze still firmly fixed on the carpet in front of him.

"Maybe next time ey?" Yuya offered, noticing how quiet Sora had gone all of a sudden. He offered no reply, and instead turned back around partly to finish getting dressed but mostly to try and hide the fact he was holding back tears.

"Anyway," Yuya said breaking the silence and placing the photograph back on Sora's bedside table, "I came up here to tell you that Yuto's coming round later so I'll be busy most of the afternoon."

This barely seemed to register with Sora as he continued getting ready. Why should he care if Yuto is coming round? He showed up here often enough. Him and Yuya were almost inseparable. Although Sora had had the least contact with Yuto out of all of Yuya's counterparts during the war, he did like him the most. He was forgiving and loyal, the two traits Sora admired the most in a person. That and he was in the most lovable relationship he'd ever seen with his best (and only) friend Yuya. He treated him like royalty, like his prince. He was always kind and gentle with Yuya, often doing the sweetest things in an attempt to make him happy, like showering him with little kisses when he was down, or whispering softly in his ear that he loved him more than life itself.

"I'm sure you guys will have fun," Sora answered despondently, but in a much more suggestive tone than he'd intended. He turned back around now fully dressed, half expecting Yuya to have gone already. Instead he was greeted with a red faced Yuya who stood by the doorway awkwardly shuffling his feet.

"It's not like that!" Yuya laughed nervously, rubbing the back of his neck in an uncharacteristic show of bashfulness. "He's bringing a friend who I haven't seen in a while."

This peaked Sora's interest. Who could it be? Yuya kept in constant contact with all of the Lancers. "Who is it? Ruri? Kaito? Someone from Syncho maybe?" Sora questioned, coming off as much more inquisitive than he intended to be.

"None of those actually," Yuya teased, knowing full well that Sora was indeed being strangely more curious about his company than normal. "It's Shun Kurosaki."

Sora's heart skipped a beat. He staggered backwards in complete disbelief, grabbing the side of the wardrobe to keep himself from falling.

Yuya looked concerned. "Are you sure you're alright Sora?" he asked, offering his hand.

Sora was far from alright. Shun Kurosaki was coming to HIS house. The boy he'd known so well during the war, the boy he'd fought alongside and against countless times… the boy who now was his only hope.

Sora knew there was no guarantee Shun was anything like him. But there was a chance, a possibility. This was enough for him. Enough to stem the tide of emotion Sora was trying so hard to battle against. His body knew this, and it had responded as soon as the words 'Shun Kurosaki' had left Yuya's mouth.

His heart had been the first to react, as if it knew something the rest of Sora didn't. The palpation that he'd felt so suddenly in his chest had sent a shockwave through his entire system, feelings of surprise and astonishment bouncing between the poles of his body before reverberating around his chest and reaching his extremities. Here these feelings settled, tinged with the sensation of pure excitement of the possibilities unfolding before him.

Even if it had only been for half a second, this tremor set his heart afire, jolting it back to life so that it could begin its dance anew, but this time to a much faster beat. Its flutter became a throb, the calm vibrato of his pulse replaced by a brisk rhythmic thumping more akin to the sound of a machine gun than a human heart.

"I…I'm fine," Sora stuttered breathlessly, trying to gain his composure. He swatted Yuya's hand away and gave him a small grin. He was getting over the initial shock, with it now being replaced completely by a scintillating feeling of excited impatience.

"If you say so," Yuya sighed resignedly, still with a look of great concern etched across his face. He turned slightly towards the door. "I'll see you later, but make sure you tell Mom if you're sick okay?"

Sora nodded reservedly in acceptance, the excitement of having the opportunity to meet Shun again almost being too much for him to contain.

Yuya gave him a quick wave before stepping out into the hallway. "Oh and," he shouted from just outside the now slightly ajar door, "it's your turn to wash the dishes!"

Sora stood backed against the wardrobe pouting, as Yuya ran downstairs laughing to himself wildly.


	3. Back to Reality

Chapter 3: Back to Reality

"Sora! You better have those dishes done by the time Yuto gets here or there'll be trouble!" Yoko shouted from the living room.

"I'm doing them right now!" he answered rather belatedly, his train of thought broken by Yoko's outburst. He was standing over the sink in the kitchen, his sleeves rolled up to the elbows, staring silently at the bowl of steaming water in front of him.

It had been almost three hours since Yuya's announcement and Sora's head was still spinning, his fingers still tingling. But now, with so little time to go, he was beginning to panic. What was he going to say to Shun? How would Shun react to seeing Sora after so many years? Was Shun really going to be able to help him?

He leaned forward and desperately plunged his hands deep into the water looking for a much-needed distraction. The sudden onrush of warmth gripped his fingers tightly, causing his wrists and then forearms to vanish beneath the surface until he was almost elbow deep in water. "Ahh…" he hummed contently, letting the glow he felt wash over him and take hold of his mind, even if it was just for a moment.

All the questions he'd panicked himself into asking evaporated one by one, almost like the heat was extracting them through the tips of his fingers, pulling them into a liquid prison before discharging them covertly amongst the plumes of steam rising from the bowl in front of him. All his nerves, his emotion, his fear… had disappeared.

Such fleeting breaks from reality never did last long though. The ignorance and bliss he felt in that moment soon dissipated with the return of all his worries and anxieties, a barrage of negativity once again laying siege to his confidence and racking his body with nervousness.

He sighed meekly. It was hopeless. Even if Shun was like Sora, even if he was as lonely as he was, who's to say he'd even want to look at him? After all, they had once been enemies.

Sora took a step back from the sink and pressed his back to the wall behind him, his fingers curling into his palms to form tightly clenched fists.

"Please God help me," he despaired quietly, his back slowly sinking down the wall until he reached an awkward but somewhat comfortable sitting position. He embraced his knees with his short but strong arms, forcefully pulling them securely to his chest. The tiled floor beneath him was cold and wet with the water dripping silently from his hands.

An eerie stillness had engulfed the room, the only audible sound being Sora's shivers as he tried desperately to distract himself from Shun's impending arrival. He was his greatest hope and yet… he was also his greatest fear. He would find out whether another human being could truly relate to him, or he'd be handed the realisation he'd spend the rest of his life alone. Both of these revelations terrified him.

He shuddered and hastily set about trying to distract himself further. He started to count the beads of water that had collected on his pale skin, methodically tallying each one before carefully brushing them off with his finger. Each droplet would cling on as if its very existence depended on it. Sora almost felt bad for getting rid of them. They held on so defiantly, preferring to stream down his arm into a world of uncertainty than be without the soft touch of his skin.

"One...Two…Three…Four…Five…Six…Sev-"

A heavy knocking rang out through the hallway and into the kitchen, sending Sora back to reality and back into a state of complete anxiety.

All the same questions he'd been asking himself over and over began to surge through his mind once again, relentlessly striking his conscience with the feeling of sheer dread. What would Shun do when he saw him? How will Shun react? Will he just ignore Sora?

Sora could hear the sound of the door opening along with the two voices of Yuya and Yuto, both warmly greeting each other with all the love and adoration he'd come to expect from their relationship.

He tried to stand up but his legs simply wouldn't let him, the weight of expectation and self-doubt keeping him permanently grounded and unable to move.

He could hear them more clearly now as they climbed the stairs towards Yuya's room. "Come on Shun! Hurry it up man!" he heard Yuto shout.

 _Shun._

Just the mere mention of his name caused a flare of heat to shoot up Sora's chest, melting his frozen body and finally allowing him to find the strength to stand up straight.

He could hear loud, ominous footsteps making their way up the driveway.

This is it, he thought as he awkwardly staggered towards the kitchen door, taking long deep breaths as he went.

The sound of the front door slamming shut caused something in Sora to take over. It was a primal instinct deep from within, sent from his heart to make sure he didn't pass up on his only opportunity to connect with someone who potentially shared his own feelings. It was filling him with courage, courage he desperately needed to open the door and confront Shun face-to-face.

"It's now or never," he whispered, twisting the doorknob and stumbling gracelessly into the hallway. He quickly turned to face the front door and-

 _Holy shit he's standing right there._

Sora drew a sharp breath, his eyes widening as they gazed upon the tall elegant figure stood mere feet away from him.

He was unmistakeable. The long blue trenchcoat, the cardinal red scarf… the commanding aura that had made him such a physical presence on the battlefield. Sora could feel it even now, after so many years, the overwhelming intensity of his spirit… of his heart.

But something felt different. It was only a subtle change, but Sora knew it was there, he could feel it hidden deep within Shun's very essence. Behind his confident exterior and uncaring attitude was… _something._ Sora just didn't know what this _something_ was. The cloak of ambiguity Shun wore so proudly was simply far too strong.

 _Could it be the same feelings of loneliness and despair that Sora kept locked away?_

Shun began to make his way towards the stairs as if Sora wasn't there, his eyes fixed on the floor in front of him as his demeanour became colder with each step. Sora let out a tearful _no_ and ran after him, cursing himself for not making his presence more known.

"Shun wait!" He couldn't let him go now, not without finding out what was different about him.

By the time Sora got to the bottom of the stairs Shun was about halfway, walking with a purpose like he was trying to get away from something (or someone).

"Shun!" he cried, the word hanging from his lips with the strongest possible desire for the Xyz user's recognition. It was filled with longing and need, causing the sound of his name to become drawn-out and resonate up the narrow staircase.

Shun froze, seemingly giving into Sora's desperate tone. He slowly turned to look over his shoulder, and Sora at once knew why he'd tried to ignore him.

He was crying.

Sora felt a pang of guilt. The sight of Shun's beautiful eyes drowning in a shallow sea of tears was heart-breaking, but also strangely enchanting. Under normal circumstances their medallion gold hue was impressive enough, but with the glaze of emotion magnifying their brilliance... they were breath-taking.

"S-Shun I didn't mean to…" Sora stammered apologetically, slowly inching his way up the stairs. Shun remained unmoved.

After what seemed like hours, Sora had made it within a step of being face-to-face with the boy. Shun still stood with his back to Sora, peering over his left shoulder with an icy glare as teardrops continued to gracefully make their way down his reddening cheeks.

From here, Sora was close enough to see the details of Shun's partly visible face, from the striking contours of his firm jawline to the telling furrows etched into his brow. And yet, Sora was still drawn to his eyes.

He stared intently into the gleaming spheres that he found so alluringly hypnotic, praying that Shun would match his gaze. To his surprise, Shun did exactly that, turning to completely face Sora before locking eyes with the Fusion user.

And as their tearful eyes finally met, as shimmering gold fell upon lustrous emerald, Sora immediately felt the burning pain hidden within Shun's soul. It was only through his eyes that Sora could break the façade and shatter the mask that hid this pain so effectively. They truly were the windows to his troubled soul.

Sora's focus was so intense that everything began to melt away around him, a fathomless abyss enveloping the stairway until all that remained was the golden cosmos of Shun's revealing eyes staring back at him.

They held a sadness that few could detect, and fewer still could understand. But Sora… he understood. The feeling that Shun kept so secret was… loneliness.

He understood because he'd seen it a hundred times before in his own reflection. The crushing fear of isolation. The heartache of not being able to connect with new people. He knew it all too well.

They stood silently facing each other for what felt like a lifetime for Sora, the flickering emotion in Shun's eyes mirroring his perfectly. For the first time in his life he felt like he was truly connecting with someone, and they'd barely even exchanged a word.

 _Did Shun feel it too?_

Sora would never get the chance to ask as a shout from upstairs forced Sora from his blissful rapture and back to reality.

"Shun are you coming up here or are you lost or something!?" It was Yuto, probably wondering how it was possible Shun hadn't made it upstairs after all this time.

Shun looked just as startled as Sora did, just how long had they been staring at each other? With an embarrassed flush beginning to redden his already scarlet cheeks he tore his eyes from Sora's gaze, opting to stare at the floor as he turned to climb the rest of the stairs to Yuya's room.

Sora could feel the connection between the two of them severing as Shun quickly ascended the rest of the stairs, wiping his eyes with his sleeve as he went. Before Sora could stop him, he'd disappeared around the corner and the hole in his heart that longed to be understood… to be loved, opened up once again. Sora's eyes, already stinging with the loss of their emotional mirror, began to tear up as he perched on the step where Shun had once stood. Even if it was for a brief moment, Sora had felt like he had someone. Someone who could fill the void in his heart and accept him for who he really was.

Sora fought against the idea of going after him, but came to the conclusion that he'd only get in the way with Yuya and Yuto already with him.

He had to see him again. He _needed_ to see him again.

He dried his eyes with his sleeve as he started to think of how he could possibly reach out to Shun. He had no idea where he lived or worked, whether he went to college or university, or even if he'd stayed in the Standard dimension after the war.

A shiver of hopelessness creeped down his spine, whispering to him to give into the cold, harsh reality that by tomorrow, Shun would be gone and so would the only person he'd ever felt a connection with.

No.

He would find a way. Even if it took him to the ends of the Earth he'd find Shun again no matter what.

But where to start? He had so little to go on. All he knew about Shun was that his best (and from what he could tell only) friend was Yuto.

Wait that's it.

Sora rose to his feet excitedly, a hyperactive smile lighting up his face as he came to the realisation that this was the perfect way to find out all about Shun.

He had to talk to the only person that really knew him.

Yuto.


	4. A Knight's Embrace

Chapter 4: A Knight's Embrace

"I swear I was literally just here…" Sora turned a full 360 degrees, trying to look for a street name or something to give him a clue to where he actually was. It was already midday and he was stood on the corner of an empty street on the outskirts of Maiami City, a faint blue glow lighting up his arm as his duel disk tried to work out which direction to take him.

It had been a full day since Shun and Yuto had left the Sakaki household, and although Sora had been at great pains not to run after Shun at the sound of him leaving, he knew it was for the best. The only way they could truly express their feelings is if they were alone, so all Sora had to do was find out where Shun lived (he had to live alone, that much he was sure of). It was a sensible plan, hampered only by Sora's glaring absence of knowledge regarding Shun's whereabouts. This is where Yuto would come in.

Sora had managed to find out where he lived through Yuya, and with surprisingly little drama. Yuya had been a little suspicious sure, but it was justified considering how bluntly Sora had asked 'So where does your boyfriend live?'. He could have asked him about Shun, but he knew only Yuto would know where to find him. Finding Yuto was the key to finding Shun.

"Come on! Work you stupid thing!" Sora jabbed at the buttons furiously, becoming more and more visibly frustrated as the screen produced the same error message he'd seen a hundred times already today.

He'd been out since dawn, being sure to leave plenty of time in case his duel disk did indeed decide to give up on him. Sora couldn't blame it though, with all the action it had seen it had the right to give in. It still bore the scars of its tortured past, victories and defeats scratched and grazed into its hardy metal exterior. In a way, Sora was the embodiment of his machine. Along with the unhealable wounds of the Dimensional War, they both shared a desire to let go, to succumb to the lasting effects of the trauma they had suffered.

But Sora had hope. He had Shun. He wouldn't give in to the darkness until the only light in his life had been permanently extinguished… and he was not about to let that happen.

"Come… ON!" With one last thump Sora managed to restart his disk, the machine whirring back to life as the error message disappeared, leaving behind a detailed map of the surrounding area.

"FINALLY!" he cried, his shoulders relaxing knowing he could resume his search for Yuto's home.

He consulted the map, waiting for the route to recalibrate and his destination to be revealed to him. After a few impatient seconds a red pin was at last dropped onto the map… and it was directly in front of him.

Sora was stunned. Had his duel disk broken again or was Yuto's home directly across from where he was standing? Only one way to find out.

He slowly lifted his head, his eyes climbing rapidly to meet the tall dark structure looming over him.

Despite its physical presence, the building itself was rather small for a block of apartments, with only three floors and five rows of windows visible from street level. The architecture of the building only added to its charm, with a blend of modern and Victorian brickwork beckoning Sora inside with the promise of comfort and security. Sora would never have thought Yuto lived here! Reiji had offered Yuto (and the rest of the Lancers) any place in the city, so why had he chosen to live here? Probably to impress Yuya he thought with a grin as he deactivated his weary duel disk.

After checking the road was clear Sora broke into a light jog across the street, his eagerness to find Yuto (and ultimately Shun) getting the better of him. Once he'd past through the main doors and into reception, he made for the staircase, the light jog becoming a sprint as he raced up the stairs excitedly.

Normally Sora would be dreading meeting with someone from his past, but his encounter with Shun had instilled him with a new-found confidence. The bond Sora knew he and Shun could have… it was driving him, pushing aside his anxieties and fears and replacing them with complete assurance and fortitude.

It was almost like the early days of the war, relentless in his objective, his body fuelled only by need… a desire for something more, a purpose. He never truly found it on the side of Academia, nor on the side of the Lancers. But now it was different. Sora wasn't seeking to destroy, he was looking to create. Forging bonds rather than breaking them was much more fulfilling, especially considering how Shun had made him feel when he looked upon him with a sadness that was mirrored so perfectly in his own eyes. But what exactly did Sora want from Shun? To be just an ally? A friend? A companion?

 _Or part of a family?_

Sora froze on the spot as the word passed through his mind, his concentration and excitement broken by such an unusual and confusing prospect. Could his connection with Shun ever develop that far?

He shook the thought from his head and began to climb the stairs once again at the same pace as before, his focus now back completely on the task at hand.

Two sets of stairs later and Sora was out of breath, but he had arrived on the top floor where he was told Yuto lived. Now which apartment was it…? He strolled down the corridor taking in each number as he passed, trying frantically to remember which apartment Yuya had told him. Come to think of it, it was very strange that Yuya had told him every detail of where Yuto lived, right down to the apartment number. Sora had asked him only in passing, in the hope of gleaning enough information to find Yuto on his own, but Yuya had told him everything (albeit with a tone that suggested suspicion), almost like he expected it.

Sora thought nothing of it as he came to apartment four, the number setting off alarm bells in his head. This was the one.

He turned to face the door and lifted his arm to knock, stopping himself at the last second as his confidence started to fall away. His old fears were returning to haunt him, his demons trying to get the better of him.

No. He wouldn't let them. He was doing this for Shun. He wasn't going to let the ghosts of anxiety and fear possess him. Not after he'd come this far.

He knocked hard on the door, the noise echoing loudly around the hallway until the sound dissipated, leaving Sora to awkwardly wait for Yuto amidst a deafening silence.

As he was about to question whether he should knock again, he heard the faint sound of footsteps coming from inside. Sora quickly readied himself mentally, preparing himself with answers to any potential questions that Yuto would ask regarding his interest in Shun. He didn't want to make it obvious how desperate he was, but he was prepared to tell Yuto how much this means to him.

As the footsteps got closer, Sora's breathing grew heavier. It's just Yuto, Sora thought to himself. Just sweet, kind, gentle Yuto… providing he doesn't still hold any grudges for what happened during the war. If he did… all Sora could expect was the anger that had made him such a worthy adversary on the battlefield. His rage was legendary, once provoked he would become a hurricane of resentment and fury, consuming and destroying everything in his path until he felt justice had been properly served.

Sora gulped hard as the footsteps stopped abruptly. Maybe he wasn't home? Maybe he was hearing things? Maybe-

The door swung open suddenly, startling Sora and causing him to jump back in surprise. Stood leaning against the doorway was the slender figure of Yuya's counterpart and boyfriend, Yuto. He was wearing a standard black shirt and matching jeans, their tight fit almost moulded perfectly to his small but toned body.

"Sora, it's great to see you, it's been way too long. Come on in!" he grinned from behind sweeping amethyst bangs, gesturing with his hand for Sora to come inside.

Naturally Sora was stunned. He'd never expected this kind of reaction from Yuto. "Thanks," he said quietly in a daze, following Yuto blindly into the living room, only stopping when the Xyz user turned to face him as he reached the sofa at the far end of the room.

"Sora, before you say anything", Yuto looked nervous now, shuffling his feet awkwardly as the grin he sported moments ago was replaced by a look of genuine concern. "I know why you're here… Yuya told me everything."

Of course he did.

In a way Sora wasn't surprised Yuya knew of his desire to connect with Shun. He had made it kind of obvious with the way he'd reacted to hearing of Shun's visit in the first place, and then there was the way he'd acted once Shun had left, he'd made it painfully obvious their meeting had deeply affected him. When Sora had asked Yuya for Yuto's address, all he had to do was put the pieces together.

"I-I don't…I'm not," Sora stuttered nervously, his confidence again wilting as tears began to prick at the corners of his eyes.

"It's okay it's okay, you don't have to explain yourself to me." Yuto jumped forwards to close the gap between them, sensing the distress in Sora's voice. They were face-to-face now, but this only seemed to make Sora more nervous.

"Yuto I-" It was too much for Sora to bear. He broke down in a flood of tears, lunging forwards and grabbing onto Yuto's shirt, burying his face deep in the other boy's shoulder. Sora thought he could do it. He thought, with what's at stake, he could finally talk to someone from his past without becoming anxious and afraid like he always had done. He was wrong. The nerves, the desperation… it was all too much, he'd been bottling this up since the day the war ended.

Yuto hugged Sora back immediately, tightly embracing the smaller boy with the affection and love he so desperately needed.

"It's okay, everything's going to be alright," the taller boy hummed soothingly, patting Sora's head gently and squeezing him tighter until his crying became muffled in the fabric of Yuto's shirt.

For the first time in Sora's life he felt… loved. He'd never hugged anyone before. Every time Yuya had offered in the past, Sora had outright refused, always being of the mind that showing affection was a sign of weakness. But now… all he could think about and focus on was the warmth exuding through the fabric of Yuya's counterpart's shirt. The space between them was non-existent, they were as close as they would ever be, bodies pressed hard against one another, the heat betwixt the two blazing like wildfire. He never wanted to let go. He never wanted to feel the lone beating of his own heart again. Not when he could have _this._ Their hearts were pounding away in unison, intertwined in a dance of fire and heat, beating to the final cadences of a never-ending sonata. It was intoxicating.

Forget the war. Forget loneliness. Forget Shu-

No. What was he thinking? He needed Shun. This was only temporary. A fleeting feeling of completion. A mere taste of what possibly awaited him if he was to break through to Shun.

Sora pulled away slightly from Yuto's grip, looking up at the Xyz user's face from behind his collar. Yuto noticed and responded by trying to hide his growing blush behind his silky bangs. Sora couldn't help but feel… _something_. The sight of Yuto's face flushed red with the heat they were sharing… it was stirring up some feelings he'd never felt before. He'd have to explore this later though… for now he had to get back on track. Shun needed him, and he needed Shun.

Sora let go of Yuto completely and reluctantly took a step back. Although he now felt a lot emptier without Yuto's touch, their sweet embrace had made him feel a lot better. "Yuto," he said with sniffle, drying his eyes with his sleeves. "I'm sorry you had to see that".

Yuto composed himself, pushing the hair from his eyes and swapping the smile of pleasure and fulfilment he'd been wearing (since the moment Sora had hugged him) to one of concern and empathy. "You don't need to apologise," Yuto soothed. "Everyone needs to cry now and again… and besides, you're a cute crier, you should see me when I start with the tears, I barely look human," he grinned with a teasing wink.

 _Yuto called him cute._

Sora laughed it off nervously as Yuto beckoned him over to the sofa, offering him a seat beside him as Yuto let himself fall back into a pile of cushions. Sora obliged, hesitantly sitting directly next to Yuto with his arms folded apprehensively across his chest. They sat like this for a little while, until Sora decided to bravely break the silence and ask Yuto for what he came for.

"I don't know exactly what Yuya told you, but I'll assume he told you I'd come here looking for Shun?" Yuto nodded in response, encouraging Sora to continue. He took a deep breath and shifted slightly in his seat, ready to bear his soul to Yuto and hope he'd understand. Before he could open his mouth to speak however, the Xyz user turned to face him and placed a hand on his knee. He could feel his face reddening as Yuto's hand lightly gripped at the fabric of his shorts.

 _There's those feelings again._

"Sora," he squeezed a little tighter. "I'm so sorry you've had to go through these last two years without anyone but Yuya". The look in Yuto's eyes was one of regret and sadness. "I should have been there for you, like Yuya was…" He looked away from Sora's gaze.

"It's ok-"

"No it's not okay," Yuto interrupted. "I was so busy trying to be there for Shun, I forgot about everything else… Hell I damn near lost Yuya too." He shook his head wistfully, preferring to stare at his hand on Sora's knee than to look him in the eye. Silence once again enveloped the room, until Sora once again broke it with a question of his own.

"Is Shun not in a good place then?"

Yuto looked even more crestfallen.

"He hasn't been in a good place since the war ended," he admitted. "He barely talks to me most of the time, I can't get through to him anymore." Yuto looked as if he was about to break down.

"Wait so, how come he came with you to our house the other day?" Sora wondered aloud, a little too inquisitively.

"Because…" Yuto's grip loosened, a softer look reappearing on his handsome face. "He wanted to see you."

 _Holy shit._

"He asked if you'd be there," Yuto explained, "and when I told him you were, it was if I had the old Shun back again."

Sora couldn't believe what he was hearing. Shun had actually been thinking about him. Had he come to the same conclusion Sora had? That through their shared experiences they could connect with each other in a way they'd never been able to with anyone else? It was a warming feeling for Sora, finally having confirmation that Shun was indeed in a similar position to himself emotionally.

Sora smiled to himself at the thought that his soul wasn't the only one that was lost, it wandered the Earth with another, that of Shun Kurosaki. How their souls would connect was up to them, but for now, Sora needed to find out where exactly on Earth he really was.

Sora excitedly sat up, instinctively placing his hand atop of Yuto's. Yuto looked a little surprised at the gesture, but immediately took it as an invitation to turn his hand over and interlace their fingers.

Sora gulped. They were holding hands.

Sora's face turned a crimson red. He felt like he was burning up with desire and want. How was Yuto making him feel like this? Why did holding hands with a _boy_ feel so good _?_

He didn't let go. He didn't want to. He felt so safe with his hand in Yuto's.

Sora's emerald eyes were now fixed on Yuto's, hammering away at hard steel, softening Yuto's gaze further with every blow until he was gazing upon Sora with the exact same look of pure desire. The tension between them was electric, the air around them heavy with want.

Sora couldn't take much more of this. He had to explore these feelings… but not right now. Shun was his number one priority. This, whatever _this_ was, would have to wait. He reluctantly pulled his hand from Yuto's grip, averting his gaze as Yuto's expression changed to one of disappointment.

"S-So," Sora stuttered, eventually clearing his throat to continue. "Can you help me find Shun?"

Yuto was trying again to compose himself, this time failing to hide the obvious blush permanently colouring his cheeks. "Y-Yeah, yeah of course Sora." He lay back on the sofa and took a deep breath. "He lives close by, but you're best off looking by the pond in the nearby wood, he's always there during the day."

Sora finally had what he needed to find Shun. He stood up and thanked Yuto, doing his best to put on a brave smile. As he made his way towards the door, Yuto shot up and ran to open it for him, getting there just before Sora did. He turned the handle and gave it a swift pull, turning to Sora as he was to ready to leave. "I really hope you and Shun can help each other Sora, you two deserve to have people in your life you can count on."

"Thanks for all your help Yuto," he responded, stepping out into the hallway.

"Oh, one last thing," Yuto whispered, gesturing for Sora to come closer. He obliged, stepping forwards and leaning against the doorway. "If you ever need help with _anything_ , come find me, I've been through some of the things you're going through and I wish I'd had someone to help me."

Whatever could he mean? Sora thought to himself, wondering if Yuto knew how truly confused he'd become.

Sora smiled and nodded, waving Yuto goodbye as he descended the staircase to the next floor.

Although he now had a definitive answer to the question of Shun's whereabouts, he was left more confused than ever. Regardless, he had to find Shun and tell him that they didn't have to be alone anymore. He just wished he could follow this path with a clearer head.

The only thing he really knew for certain was Yuto had made him feel things he'd never felt towards anyone else before…

Wait.

Sora froze in the exact spot he had done the first time he'd climbed these stairs.

Did he have a _crush_ on Yuto?


	5. Hot Seat

Chapter 5: Hot Seat

 _Confusion. Shame. Guilt._

They had followed Sora everywhere since he left Yuto's apartment. No matter how hard Sora tried to wish away his feelings, he couldn't shake these three emotions. Even now, as he lay motionless on his bed hours later, they still refused to loosen their hold on his fragile body.

Sora shut his eyes as tightly as he could and rolled onto his front, burying his face in his pillow in a vain attempt to hide from his problems. It was no use.

The confusion he felt… it had left his mind in flux, in a state of constant doubt and bewilderment, a sea of unanswerable questions and unverifiable feelings. Within this vast ocean Sora's identity could once be found, a sturdy ship marshalling the waves with the utmost certainty and belief. It had been unsinkable, even in the harshest of emotional storms, always standing tall as the only part of him that his fears couldn't corrupt… until today. It had only been a single splinter, but it had caused the whole ship to go down, and Sora down with it. Without it he no longer knew what or who he was, he was drowning in the uncertainty that surrounded this essential part of his identity. His sexuality was always something he was so sure about… despite never acting upon it.

The possibility that he might be something other than straight… it made him feel ashamed. Not because he thought there was anything wrong with being gay or bisexual, but because of what this could do to his chances of becoming close to Shun. If he knew Sora was capable of having feelings towards other guys, he'd be sure to think Sora was only after one thing… wouldn't he?

It wasn't like that though, Sora thought angrily. His desire for Shun's company went deeper than that. Sure, thinking about it Shun _was_ handsome… with his perfect golden eyes and gallant expression… his broad shoulders and defined collar bone… his flawless body that Sora just wanted to… WHAT WAS HE THINKING!?

Sora screamed into his pillow before rolling back over onto his back, once again staring at the ceiling above him.

This is exactly why he couldn't have gone to see Shun so soon he thought. Instead he had ran straight home, stopping for no-one except Yuya who had been on his way out of their house when he'd arrived.

 _Yuya._

He'd couldn't even bring himself to look him in the eye. The guilt had been too overwhelming. Why did it have to be Yuto? Why couldn't it be someone else that made him question his own sexuality? Why couldn't Shun have been the one?

Sora couldn't explain it. These feelings were new. Perhaps if in their moment he and Shun had shared a similar level of intimacy, it would be Shun who he'd be having this crisis over. Nevertheless, it was Yuto that had first sparked these feelings and he couldn't help but feel like he'd betrayed Yuya.

He had to tell him. He _had_ to.

The guilt was eating away at him from the inside, gnawing at his psyche and intensifying the chaos that was raging within his mind, he couldn't go on like this.

Sora quickly sat up before putting both feet on the floor and standing upright.

He had to tell him, he thought to himself, walking hesitantly towards the door. Even if Yuya hated him for the rest of his life… he had to. He couldn't keep this from him.

He opened the door and peered out, checking to see if anyone else was in the house. He'd heard Yuya come back from wherever he'd gone about an hour ago, and Yoko had gone out for the day, so naturally there was no movement upstairs. He edged his way towards Yuya's room only one door down the hall, listening to see if he was busy. All he could hear was the shuffling of cards.

Sora arrived at Yuya's room, the door slightly ajar. He had to do this. It was the only thing in his mind that he was certain about. Of course he was scared and hesitant, he was probably going to lose his only real friend, the only one who really cared about him… but this guilt… it was tearing him apart.

He knocked lightly, with Yuya quickly spotting him through the crack in the door and responding cheerily for him to come in. Sora entered solemnly, staring at his feet as he walked over to the bean bag opposite Yuya.

"Yuya, I have to tell you something," he confessed quietly, perching on the edge of the bean bag like he was ready to make a run for it if he had to.

"Oh?" Yuya looked up from the cards on the floor with a slightly puzzled look on his face.

Sora continued to look at the floor. "I-I… I'm…" he stuttered.

"Struggling," Yuya offered, his face now a picture of concern.

Sora said nothing. He couldn't form words anymore. He'd hurt the only person in the world that cared about him.

Yuya noticed Sora's silence and got up to pull his own bean bag closer to him. He perched on its edge like Sora did and leant forward. "Is this about Yuto?" he whispered.

Sora was taken aback. How did Yuya know!? And why was he being so calm about it?

Sora nodded slightly and managed to whisper a barely audible _yes_ to confirm what Yuya definitely already knew.

A deathly silence enveloped the room. Sora was scared. Really scared. The prospect of being even more alone than he already was... it terrified him.

Suddenly, a reassuring hand was placed on his shoulder. Sora finally looked up to see Yuya smiling at him. It was a comforting smile, full of warmth and compassion. He didn't understand. Shouldn't Yuya be shouting at him and hitting him right now? Why was he smiling?

"Sora, it's okay," he soothed, smile widening. "Yuto told me what happened between you two, how you reacted."

Sora's head snapped up, his gaze finding Yuya's. "I-I… I don't know what happened," he choked out, "I… I… just don't know anymore." With that Sora put his head in his hands, trying to hide the fact he was so close to tears.

Yuya tightened his grip on Sora's shoulder, squeezing hard as if to acknowledge his pain. "I can't imagine how you feel Sora, with what the war did to you… and now this." He continued, "I can't relate to the things you did and saw in the war as much as Shun will be able to, but I can definitely help you with what your feeling now."

Sora took his hands from his face and placed them back by his sides, giving Yuya a timid smile before wiping his eyes with his sleeves. "You can?" he asked, his voice now filled with hope.

"Of course!" Yuya beamed, taking his hand from Sora's shoulder now he seemed to have cheered up a bit. His expression became more serious as he went on. "I went through the same thing you're going through, but this was before Yuto and I were a couple so I had to figure it out all on my own, and so did Yuto from the sounds of it."

"So you and Yuto already knew how you felt before you got together?" Sora asked, hoping Yuya's smile would return.

Thankfully it soon did, lighting up the room once more. "We knew yeah, but we both wished we'd have had someone to help us understand what we were feeling." Yuya beamed once more. "You won't have that problem though, because I'm here for you… we both are."

"Both-?"

As if by magic, Yuto appeared in the doorway. Sora's jaw hit the floor. Had he been there the whole time!?

He shot Sora a sly grin before making his way over to Yuya and kneeling behind him, draping his arms over the other boy's shoulders and softly kissing his cheek.

"H-H-How?" Sora spluttered, completely dumfounded at Yuto's sudden entrance.

"As you were coming back home I was heading to Yuto's for the day, but after he told me what happened we sorta' knew how you must be feeling and came back here instead hoping you'd come find us," Yuya explained with a giggle, Yuto now peppering Yuya's cheek with even more little kisses.

"Oh… sorry I had to go ruining your day," Sora frowned apologetically.

"You did nothing of the sort," Yuto replied sharply. He gave Yuya one last kiss before rising to his feet and grabbing another bean bag from across the room. He placed it down next to Yuya and flopped onto it before sitting upright and focusing on Sora. "Like he said, we're both here for you Sora, we want to help you understand your feelings." His smile mirrored Yuya's perfectly, the Xyz user having spent so much time with Yuya that he had managed to pick up his signature spirited smile.

"Thanks guys," he replied a little more cheerily, trying his best to reciprocate the smile that both boys wore so perfectly.

Sora couldn't quite believe it. Instead of wanting to hurt him, Yuya actually wanted to help him! Yuto must have known how he'd made him feel… had he made it that obvious?

"So Sora," Yuto leant forward as if he was about to start asking some serious questions. "This might be hard to answer but, what was it about me that made you start to question yourself?"

Sora's face turned bright red. He turned to look at Yuya for help, who slowly nodded in encouragement.

Sora took a deep breath. He can do this. All he has to do is try and explain how he felt (easier said than done), then things might become a little clearer.

"I-I mean you..." Sora struggled to get his words out at first, the embarrassment of the whole situation catching up with him. But then he remembered what Yuto and Yuya had said to him. 'We're both here for you'. Those words meant everything to Sora, they truly were something special, something to hold onto. Just knowing how much they really cared about him gave him the strength and confidence to be more open. "It was the way you looked," he confessed, staring directly at Yuto now. "You looked so hot and flushed… it made me feel things I've never felt about a guy before."

Now it was Yuto's turn to shy away in embarrassment, hiding his growing blush behind his bangs like he always did. Yuya on the other hand gave Yuto a playful nudge before responding with another question. "How did it make you feel exactly?"

Sora sat quietly for a moment to think before deciding to say whatever came into his head. "It… It made me want more," he blurted out. "In that moment all I could think about was… that look. I wanted the passion he was hiding, to see and feel his heat… to hear him panting and screaming my name-" Sora stopped himself abruptly, and dropped his head to stare ashamedly at the floor, realising that he was talking about not just any _boy_ , but Yuya's boyfriend, who was also sat in the room with him.

Although Yuya was a little shocked by Sora's confession, he was grinning widely nonetheless. "Sora, I'm really proud of you," he declared softly. "That must have been so hard for you." He patted Sora's knee as the Fusion user gingerly looked up at Yuya. "I know these are new feelings, but you can't ignore them, you have to just accept them as part of who you are."

Sora still wasn't convinced. It was so confusing. Why was it only now that he was finding himself wanting to do things with guys? Did he really find Yuto attractive? Did he like Shun in that way too? "Yuya I'm still so confused," he professed, giving the Pendulum user a worried frown. "I don't know what's happening to me… I don't truly know if I could feel what I felt again. I mean, I could be into guys I guess… but what if it was just a one-time thing? I just don't know…" He sighed heavily.

"Feelings are hard to understand." Yuya's tone was serious and heartfelt, but it had a hint of excitement behind it. "That's why we're here to help! We'll get you through this and find you some answers don't worry!"

"Thanks… but how are we going to do that exactly?" The rising intonation in Sora's voice revealed something between intrigue and curiosity.

"Well… I do have one or two ideas," he grinned, shooting Sora a mischievous wink. "How about we start by seeing if what you felt wasn't just a one-time thing?" He turned to look at Yuto who looked adorably flustered, knowing full well what Yuya was about to do.

Before he could protest, Yuya lunged at Yuto, pushing him off the bean bag and pinning him to the floor with his body. He grabbed both his hands above his head, interlocking their fingers. Yuya drew closer, resting his forehead on Yuto's. His face had already changed from pink to a crimson red, his eyes filling with passion as he stared into the playful eyes of his lover.

Sora was in pieces. Yuya had barely been on top of Yuto for more than a second and he already felt the same way he had done back at the apartment. No... it was stronger this time. The want, the need… he could feel and sense it taking over his whole body, possessing him.

Down on the floor Yuto was biting his lip expectantly, whispering Yuya's name, knowing what was coming next. He didn't have to wait much longer. Yuya released Yuto's hands and pushed himself upright before planting his knees either side of the Xyz user's hips, straddling him.

Without warning he firmly gripped at Yuto's collar and pulled him up into a rough, almost forceful kiss. It took Yuto by surprise, but within a second he returned it with just as much fervour, their lips smacking together as their passion consumed them. Their kisses were quick and messy, with neither boy stopping to breathe.

Yuto bit down hard on Yuya's bottom lip, earning a stifled moan from the boy. He could feel Yuya's grip on his collar loosening. Biting had always been his lover's weakness. Yuto decided to take charge, asserting control over Yuya by cupping his face and pulling him downwards until the Pendulum user was once again lay on top of him.

Sora was burning up with desire. He should feel uncomfortable, awkward even, watching the two boys express their love for each other in such an intimate way. But he didn't. All he could feel was raw attraction. This pretty much confirmed it, he was definitely into guys.

Now it was Yuto's turn. He placed a hand on Yuya's side just next to his heart and began gently tracing the edges of his ribs with his fingers. Yuya shivered with pleasure.

Yuto then went to work on Yuya's neck, leaning in close so his lover could feel his hot breath teasing his skin. "Oh Yuto…" Yuya breathed, grabbing his head and pulling him close, the Xyz user's lips finally meeting the crook of his neck. Yuya moaned louder this time.

Yuto took this as an invitation to start nipping at Yuya's skin with his teeth, the boy's breathing becoming hitched each time he did so. He could feel his hair being gripped harder and harder, begging him for more. Yuto obliged, biting hard at the now pink patch of skin he'd been paying special attention to.

Yuya moaned out Yuto's name over and over, not once stopping to consider what Sora would think of him after this. Yuto continued even more determined, lacing the spot with kisses as he savoured Yuya's moans. Once Yuya had quietened down again, Yuto started right back up again, this time interspersing the kisses with bites that lasted much longer, sucking at the areas roughly with the help of his teeth. Yuya couldn't take any more of this. He was trembling with arousal, longing so desperately for completion.

He awkwardly rolled off of Yuto, sitting up on the floor and finally looking back at Sora. Yuto sat up and did the same. They were both panting heavily, sweat and passion soaking their bodies.

Sora was sat on the edge of his seat, his mouth agape. He'd turned a candy red, his face flushed with heat, making him look almost feverish in appearance. His normally sombre green eyes were alight with excitement and lust.

Yuya and Yuto turned to give each other a playful grin before looking back in Sora's direction.

He couldn't move. He couldn't speak. He'd never seen a more enticing sight.

"So," Yuto asked, pushing his sweat soaked bangs to the side. "You feel any clearer?"

Sora could only nod rapidly, trying his best to signal to the two boys how much he wanted to experience what he'd just seen for himself.

Yuya and Yuto looked at each other again and giggled with the Xyz user nodding in response to a flirtatious wink from his lover. Yuya turned back to Sora and locked eyes with him.

"Soraaaa," Yuya teased, putting his arm around Yuto as they both gazed up at him. "I think Yuto and I need to… let off some steam…"

Sora's eyes widened. The thought of them together… it only made him want it more. Maybe if-

Yuya wasn't finished. "…do you want to maybe come and join us?"


	6. The Heat of the Moment

Chapter 6: The Heat of the Moment

Sora sat there in stunned silence, mouth agape, eyes transfixed on the sweat soaked boys in front of him. Had he heard Yuya correctly? Did he really just ask him to join in with them?

He wanted to. So badly.

The hunger that had grown from deep inside of him was voracious, begging to be satiated by the touch of the two boys. It had taken over his entire body, enveloping him in an indescribable heat he'd never felt before. It made him want to explore every inch of Yuya's body, and taste everything Yuto had to offer.

…but he couldn't accept.

Not when he knew he could potentially feel this same way about Shun. He had to see him again. He had to know if what he originally felt for him was more than what he thought it was. The connection they shared ran deep, but had it just been a disguise for his true feelings that had been hidden from him all along? He had to find out.

"I-I… not right now sorry, it just wouldn't be the right time for me… I don't think I'm ready, and I want my first time to be with that special someone." He hung his head in apology.

Sora was speaking from the heart, his honesty catching Yuya and Yuto unawares for a moment. They looked at each other, then Yuto turned to Sora, "Someone like…Shun?" he whispered.

"Maybe." Sora's face was still a bright red. "I felt something really strong for him when we met after all those years… is this what I was feeling?"

Yuya spoke up, taking off his pendulum and placing it beside him, earning a wide grin from Yuto. "I think you should talk to him, see how you feel and you never know, he might feel the same way."

Sora perked up a bit, rising to his feet. He felt a little light-headed after what he'd just been through, but it was the tight feeling in his shorts that was most uncomfortable. He scratched the back of his neck nervously and smiled at the pair. "Thanks a lot guys." They both beamed back at him.

"If Yoko asks where I've gone Yuya, just make something up would ya?" he said hurriedly, making his way to the door.

"Sure, now go find Shun!" Yuya responded, almost ordering him.

Sora waved goodbye, before running out of the room and down the stairs, only stopping to shout a final remark back up at them. "You two have fun!"

"Oh, we will…" Yuto whispered to Yuya, his grin somehow becoming even more mischievous than it already was.

Yuya giggled, the colour in his face returning in response to Yuto's suggestive tone. "But first," he shot up and ran to close the door, locking it behind him. He then stood with his back pressed to the door, his eyes glistening with anticipation, almost begging Yuto to take him right there and then.

Yuto's eyes became glazed with lust at the sight, his heart hitting hyperdrive as he noticed the bulge in Yuya's pants. He hastily stood up and walked with intent towards Yuya, ready to finally let his need completely take over. Yuya was slowly sliding down the door with every step Yuto made, biting his lip, waiting for him to take control of his body once again.

Yuto slammed his lips onto Yuya's, pressing his whole body up against the other boy, pinning him to the door. Yuto held Yuya by the back of his neck in one hand, the other gripping the back of Yuya's thigh. Yuya had already softened to Yuto's grip, allowing himself to be kept upright only by the force of their kiss.

It wasn't enough for Yuto though. He wanted Yuya weak at the knees, for him to melt into a pool of pleasure and sexual ecstasy. He wanted to break him down, for him to beg for more, only to build him back up again to the point where he wouldn't stop screaming his name… and he knew just the way to do it.

Yuto began nibbling at Yuya's bottom lip, lightly sucking at it before moving his teeth over its soft texture. Yuya let out a stifled moan, the heat flushing his cheeks a red similar in intensity to the colour of his hair. Yuto didn't stop. Instead he turned his attention back to the neck that he loved to tease so much.

He grabbed Yuya's chin with his right hand, releasing his thigh, and yanking his head up to his level to gain access to the crook of his neck. He went to work swiftly, layering it with kisses and scraping at the skin with his teeth. Yuya's breathing grew heavier, his desire for his boyfriend even fiercer now. Yuto started to bite at a specific spot on Yuya neck, just under his shoulder. The mix of pain and pleasure was so intense, he couldn't help but tremble. Yuto grinned as he bit down harder and started to suck with the intention of leaving a mark. He wanted Yuya to look in the mirror every day and see it, a constant reminder that he could make him feel like this whenever he felt like it.

Yuya's breathing hitched as Yuto found a sensitive spot, his tongue beginning to swirl around it before biting down once again. Yuya was shaking, his arousal beginning to hurt, his pants feeling tighter and tighter. He bucked his hips involuntarily, in a desperate attempt to gain some relief.

Yuto stopped biting momentarily. He pulled back from Yuya's neck to stare into his lover's eyes. He felt a little cruel doing this, especially seeing how badly Yuya wanted it from the lustful look in his eyes, but he couldn't let him have it just yet.

"Not yet, Yuya. Not yet…" he remarked seductively before pulling Yuya's head closer to his and whispering in his ear, "...All you have to is wait a little longer… my _Prince_."

Yuya couldn't help but lose control at the word, his hips again bucking into Yuto's. Yuto could only grin at the feeling of Yuya's arousal hitting his own, as although he wanted it just as bad as Yuya, he still wanted to see him completely give in to his touch. Yuto brought his knee up between Yuya's legs and rested it under his crotch, making the younger boy cry out his name in frustration.

Now Yuto was getting somewhere. He wasn't finished yet though. He slid his hands up Yuya's shirt, exploring every inch of his skin as he went. Yuya responded immediately by pulling his shirt completely over his head and throwing it to the floor, then grabbing Yuto by the hair and pulling him closer till the Xyz user's face was pressed hard against his chest.

Yuto couldn't help letting out a small moan of his own, the warmth of Yuya's skin reminding him how physically close they were right now. The heat between them was so intense, the fires of their passion so bright… Yuto couldn't think straight. Yuya had taken over his mind, becoming his only thought, his only desire. He _wanted_ Yuya. He _needed_ Yuya.

Yuto let out a long, drawn-out breath before letting loose a flurry of kisses to the centre of Yuya's chest, slowly making his way leftwards with each kiss, eventually getting close enough to Yuya's nipple for the boy to moan out in pleasure. This was a sensitive area, and the smirk on Yuto's face revealed he very much knew that.

He continued to tease Yuya, his tongue occasionally darting out to taste the surrounding skin. Just has he had done before on Yuya's neck, Yuto eventually let his tongue do all the work, swirling it in a clockwise motion around the hardening pink nub. Yuya moaned for more, and Yuto was happy to oblige, suddenly taking it completely into his mouth, sucking and scraping at it in the hope of eliciting the reaction he so desperately wanted to hear from Yuya.

"O-Oh Yuto don't stop!" Yuya cried, his white-knuckle grip on Yuto's hair tightening. Yuto continued with more intensity, with the Pendulum user responding with a fresh set of moans. Yuto knew just what buttons to press when it came to bringing his boyfriend to the brink.

Yuto pushed his knee a little harder into Yuya's crotch, upping the pressure on the younger male's arousal. Yuya's shaking became more pronounced, his breathing even heavier. Yuto let his hands begin to explore Yuya's abdomen, his fingers sensually tracing the contours of Yuya's faint abs, stopping only to caress the sensitive skin just above the waistband of his trousers.

Yuya was becoming dizzy. He desperately hung on to the back of Yuto's head with his hands, moaning and clawing at his boyfriend with all the passion and sexual ferocity of a tiger in heat.

"Yuto! I think I'm gonna…" Yuya tensed up and Yuto felt it instantly. He released his mouth from Yuya's nipple and moved his hands away just in time, his knee still pressed firmly into Yuya's bulge denying him his release.

Yuya's body went limp. "P-Please Yuto..." he whispered in frustration. "I'll do whatever you want just please… let me cum."

Yuto grinned, almost triumphantly. That's what he wanted to hear. He wanted Yuya to know that he was the one that was in control, that he was the only one that could allow Yuya to reach his climax.

"As you wish, my Prince…" Yuto teased, placing his hands on Yuya's hips and sliding his fingers under the waistband of both his trousers and his boxers. Yuya drew in a sharp breath.

Yuto tugged at the fabric, slowly pulling them both down as Yuya squirmed in a vain attempt to free his lower half. Yuto knelt down to finish the job, only needing to pull a little more before Yuya's pants lay around his ankles. Yuya moaned as his throbbing erection sprang free, the rush of cold air making him shiver slightly.

Yuto rose back to his feet, please with his work. Yuya was a horny, naked mess… just how he wanted him. The pair were somehow still standing, Yuya slumped against the door with Yuto bearing down over him, ready to finally give him his reward for waiting so long.

Yuto removed his own shirt and threw it to the floor, earning a blush from Yuya as he got an eyeful of Yuto's toned but slender body. It was a beautiful sight. Yuto's muscles tensed as he began to unbuckle his belt and remove his jeans, the black denim material soon hitting the floor along with his black and grey boxers.

Yuto stood, completely naked save for his wristbands and choker, in front of Yuya and smiled, before locking lips with the Pendulum user and pushing him hard against the door once again, both boys letting out stifled moans as their arousals met. Yuto pulled his hips back and grabbed hold of Yuya's member, stroking it slowly and teasingly, hoping to hear Yuya moan his name again. Instead, Yuya did the same, taking Yuto by surprise as he caressed the older boy's length, running his hand along the shaft before lightly tugging at the end.

Yuto's breathing quickened, his desire spreading to his face as he turned a crimson red. He needed this, but he still wanted to show Yuya who was truly in control. He gripped at the base of Yuya's cock and began to pump at a quickening pace, causing the red and green haired boy to moan incessantly, begging for his release.

"Together…" Yuto whispered, urging Yuya to do the same to him. Yuya could barely see straight, but he grasped at Yuto's length and started to stroke at a similar pace.

Almost immediately Yuto could feel the tension building up inside him, the release he craved just as much as Yuya so close now.

Yuya was whimpering, his grip on Yuto tighter than ever, their bodies tensing up in anticipation at what was to come.

Yuto pumped Yuya's member faster and faster, with the other boy mirroring his actions as they both neared completion.

"OH… YUTOOO!" Yuya threw his head back and screamed as Yuto squeezed and pumped the tip in just the right place, his hips bucking as he was finally able to let go. All of his passion and his desire came spilling out, his release covering Yuto's chest in a hot sticky mess of satisfaction.

It was all too much for Yuto. The heat of Yuya's release and the feverish look on the boy's face… it was enough to send him completely over the edge.

He came with a loud moan onto Yuya's chest and smooth abs, Yuya continuing to stroke his length till he was sure his boyfriend had finished entirely.

They both stood, trembling, their bodies soaked with sweat and the products of their combined passion. After a moment of silence, Yuya collapsed into Yuto's arms.

Yuto eased his boyfriend down the door, till he was lay comfortably propped up against its frame. Yuto sat down next to him and put his arm around him, whispering to the younger boy that they'd get cleaned up in just a moment.

They lay like this for a good few minutes, basking in the afterglow of such a heated encounter. The silence was eventually broken by a giggling Yuya who turned to Yuto and kissed his cheek before softly whispering into his ear, "Sora really missed out huh?"

"His loss," Yuto laughed, grinning widely at Yuya.

"It's too bad… he is kinda cute," Yuya grinned back mischievously.

Yuto gave him a playful elbow to the ribs and laughed back, rising to his feet and informing Yuya he was going to go and run them both a bath. Before he could leave the room however he felt Yuya tug back on his arm from where he was sitting. He was staring up at him with the most beautiful eyes, his shimmering rubies coated with devotion and affection.

"I love you Yuto," he sang, smiling wondrously.

Yuto smiled heartily,

"I love you too Yuya."


	7. Chasing the Horizon

Chapter 7: Chasing the Horizon

It was the middle of the evening when Sora finally reached the wood near Yuto's apartment, having ran all the way here in the hope of finding Shun. It wasn't quite dark yet, with the sun resolutely continuing to shine despite the cloud cover that was typical of a cold and dreary early winter's day.

Sora couldn't feel the cold however. A fire had been lit inside of him, ignited by the thought of getting to meet with Shun once again and finally being able to come to terms with the feelings he had for him.

Yuya and Yuto had told him to see how he felt once they had talked, and that's exactly what he was going to do, he thought to himself defiantly.

Sora stopped at the opening to the wood to catch his breath. Before him lay a dense forest of either ash or elder trees, with a small dirt track cutting through the middle. It didn't look very well-travelled, with the ground almost entirely covered by clumps of weeds. Creeping thistles and plantains provided the odd bit of colour, but it was lost on the drab and unkempt nature of the path. The trees themselves were as off colour as you would expect in winter, their leaves now a dull brown, curling hopelessly in on themselves in anticipation of their deaths.

Despite such a discouraging sight, Sora was still very optimistic.

Still a little out of breath, he began to walk the path in front of him, his mind wondering to what Yuya and Yuto were probably doing right now.

He swallowed heavily and stopped for a moment as the thought of Yuya and Yuto in bed together crossed his mind.

Yuya's quivering body, Yuto's furious kisses… the way that Yuya would moan when Yuto put his-

Sora shook the thought out of his head as his shorts tightened a little. This _wasn't_ what he needed right now, especially after how long it took for him to regain control last time.

He pressed on, preferring to put his focus on the environment around him, which was somehow growing ever greener and more colourful.

He eventually came to a wooden gate, surrounded on either side by decrepit fencing. He opened it and stepped through, continuing onwards and making a hard left at the end of the winding path.

Sora was shocked to see how different this part of the trail appeared to be. On either side of the overgrown path the trees and foliage had completely changed. Gone were the dull browns of the leaves of the elder and ash trees, replaced entirely by the towering white bark of numerous silver birch trees. The space between them was filled with well-kept bushes of holly, their evergreen leaves and vibrant red berries a perfect contrast to the ivory backdrop provided by the silver birches.

Sora slowly made his way onwards, making sure to take in the beauty of his surroundings with every step he made. Even the ground beneath his feet looked to be in better shape, the weeds all but disappearing as the path narrowed.

After a few minutes he came to a slight incline, the path becoming so narrow that the holly began to brush at his arms, its glossy green leaves pricking at his fingers.

A little further up and the bushes were thinning out, as were the trees.

Sora thought he could see a clearing through the branches and to the left, but it was impossible to tell as the number of trees and their branches still prevented him from getting a good look.

Walking a little faster now, he realised that he must have been right as the path started to arc slightly leftwards.

Spotting what looked to be a clearing in the trees, he ran forwards, stopping abruptly as he finally reached the end of the long path and came out into a small clearing.

Sora's mouth dropped open.

From where he stood, the view he had was breath-taking.

The trees had fallen away completely, the almost circular clearing completely surrounded by types of bushes and shrubs that Sora had never seen before. Pastel oranges and snow whites defended the wall of green that encircled it, with the bright yellow hue of a single gorse bush brightening the scene further.

Flowering buddleias commanded the flanks of the glade, their purple and pink heads adding to the kaleidoscope of colour already assembled before him. Holly featured heavily amongst their ranks too, its polished reds and verdurous greens making the display almost festive in appearance.

At the clearing's centre lay a large pond, bathed in the day's remaining sunlight. Its waters were calm and tranquil, peaceful in nature and crystalline in appearance. At its banks rested legions of aquatic and waterborne plants, verdant and lush. Lilies floated freely on the pond's surface, supported by the abundance of bulrushes that rose fiercely from the depths, their catkins raised like the tips of spears.

It truly was a veritable oasis of colour and life, unbridled in its serenity and stillness. But for Sora, it wasn't the view that made his heart skip a beat, it was the boy that sat cross-legged on the pond's nearest bank that did that.

 _Shun._

He had his back to Sora, looking out across the pond.

Sora started to feel a little nervous as he stood staring at the boy.

Shun was only a few metres away, and he could already feel his powerful aura, that overwhelming presence that had him frozen to the spot when they had last met.

Sora began to approach anyway, tentatively edging his way towards the pond's banking where Shun sat. After what he'd had been through the past couple of days he wasn't about to back out now.

He tip-toed onwards until he was stood directly next to Shun, who hadn't so much as batted an eyelid at Sora's presence.

Sora panicked a little inside at Shun's unresponsiveness but then quickly remembered that he was probably really nervous, and way too proud to speak first.

He was nervous too, but Yuya and Yuto had really helped him to feel more confident about himself. It also helped a lot knowing that Shun actually had an interest in him thanks to Yuto. It reassured him that the connection he'd felt when they'd met back at the house wasn't completely one-sided.

Sora carefully bent down and took a seat on the banking less than a metre from Shun. He tried not to sit too close or too far, knowing that too close could be uncomfortable, and too far could show he didn't care.

The grass was a little wet, but Sora didn't mind. He was too busy staring idly at Shun's beautiful face, his harsh features illuminated by the embers of sunlight that still lit the sky.

He wanted to stop, he knew he was probably making Shun feel uncomfortable, but he couldn't. He was awe-struck… again.

Shun was looking out across the pond, still appearing to be almost completely unaware of Sora's presence.

Sora just continued to stare. He couldn't look away.

He felt… attraction? But not the kind of raw attraction he'd had when he'd seen Yuya and Yuto make out. It was different, more emotional.

Shun must have felt Sora's gaze burning into him because he soon turned his head to look away, his cheeks becoming a little flushed as he tried to hide his embarrassment.

Sora wanted to apologise but didn't know how to phrase it. He needed to say something though. He really wanted to just talk to Shun, to get him to open up, to share his anxieties and fears so Sora could do the same. After all, that was the reason he'd wanted to see Shun again in the first place.

"S-Shun?" he questioned a little too quietly, his nerves getting the better of him.

Shun stared back out across the water. "Sora," he replied, his voice calm but with a sharpness to it that scared Sora slightly.

Silence once again descended upon the pair. The clearing itself was well-sheltered and had almost no wind blowing through it, making the silence even more deafening.

Sora swallowed and grimaced. This wasn't going well, he thought. He had to do something.

He moved a little closer to Shun and shifted his weight, swinging his legs around till his body was facing Shun's side.

Shun again didn't even flinch.

"S-So," Sora stuttered bravely, "do you come here often?" He cursed himself mentally for not coming up with a better ice breaker than that, especially considering he already knew the answer.

"As often as I can," he replied pointedly.

"How come?" Sora asked, again immediately regretting asking such a dumb and obvious question.

In response to his question, Shun pointed across the pond towards its edge, where a small bird was hesitantly wading its way along the shallows.

"What is it?" Sora questioned curiously, shuffling closer to Shun so he could follow his arm's direction more closely.

"It's a curlew," Shun replied with great enthusiasm. "You can tell by its long bill and brown plumage."

Sora was intrigued. He'd never seen a bird like this before.

"Are they common around here?" Sora's voice became hushed as the bird stood perfectly still, listening in on their conversation.

"They're not common in many places anymore, but this is a spot where I know they love to come, even out of season… it's the main reason I come here, that and the quiet."

Shun's face was now a bright red, and to try and hide it he uncrossed his legs and leant his arms on his knees, shielding his face from view. "It's silly really."

"Hey it isn't silly!" Sora almost shouted, scaring the long-billed curlew off into the bushes. "I think it's awesome you've found this spot where you can chill out on your own, it's so pretty!" He wasn't sure where he was getting this confidence from, but it felt so good to be able to talk to Shun.

"And to be honest, birds are usually better company than people," he joked (rather bravely, he thought).

Shun let out a small laugh. He re-crossed his legs and splayed his hands on the grass behind him, revealing his beautiful face once again.

A smile flashed across his lips before quickly disappearing.

 _Shun just smiled. He actually smiled._

Sora was finally getting somewhere.

He felt a surge of feelings inside him come bubbling to the surface, urging him to jump at Shun and just squeeze him tight.

He didn't though. Instead he shuffled closer to him so they were almost side-by-side, looking out across the pond together.

Shun fidgeted slightly at the sudden intrusion, but seemed satisfied with their proximity nonetheless.

They sat like this for a few minutes, the sunlight starting to wane as dusk approached.

"Sora," Shun started quietly, turning to look at him directly, his golden eyes a tantalising shade of gold and orange in the light of the setting sun. "I'm going to be honest with you."

Sora gazed back, his heart beginning to thump faster as he tried to anticipate what Shun was going to say.

"The last few months… the last few years…" he corrected himself, "I've felt lost…" He hung his head in sadness.

Sora was almost tearing up, the sorrow in Shun's voice palpable.

"No-one could understand what I went through, the pain and the suffering, the loneliness… not even Yuto." Shun sniffed back some tears, wiping furiously at his eyes with his sleeve.

He looked up and cast his gaze back at Sora, his eyes brimming with tears. "But you gave me hope…" He offered a weak smile, tears beginning to spill from the corners of his eyes. "When Yuto mentioned that you lived with Yuya, I thought that maybe with what you went through… you might still be feeling the same way-"

"I've felt exactly the same way," Sora interrupted, desperate to reassure Shun they were one in the same. "But… I need to be honest with you too."

He was crying too now, unable to keep the slew of emotions he felt from surfacing at the prospect of confessing his feelings.

He had to though. He had to know if Shun felt the same connection between them as he did.

"When I saw you at the house the other day… I felt something for you, a kind of connection that I'd never felt before…"

Shun looked at Sora, a little confused.

Sora continued on, his confidence evaporating as his hands gripped at the grass between them, trying his best to summon up the strength to profess how he truly felt. "…it was amazing but… I think that I-I…" He hung his head as Shun had done to avoid the other's gaze,

"… _might like you_."

"How do you mean?" Shun asked confused, which really worried Sora.

"I really like you," he blurted out, his face now burning up. "In a way I didn't think was possible till-"

Sora felt something warm on top of his hand, stopping him mid-sentence.

He looked down to see Shun's palm resting on top of his scrunched-up fist, his long fingers clasping gently around it.

Sora was speechless. His heart had now completely melted. The loving warmth of Shun's tender hand upon his was the most pleasant feeling he'd ever experienced. Every emotion, every fear, every anxiety he ever had just fell away, leaving nothing but the affection and love he wanted to share with Shun so badly.

"It's okay," Shun whispered, turning Sora's hand over in his and interlocking their fingers. "I felt the same thing between us and… I like you too."

He blushed harder than before, but didn't break eye contact with Sora.

Sora was still crying, tears of happiness rolling gradually down his cheeks in response to his admission. Knowing that Shun felt the same way… it made him feel like his whole life now had meaning, as if this was the start of something new and exciting.

The tenderness of the moment they were sharing (and the decreasing temperature) made him want to get closer to Shun, so he lifted their hands and shuffled closer till they were shoulder to shoulder.

Sora leaned in and rested his head upon the taller boy's shoulder, their entwined hands falling onto Shun's leg and staying there.

He felt so calm like this. Like nothing in the world mattered except for Shun and his broad but comfortable shoulders. He could stay like this forever…

Sora hadn't noticed how dark it had actually gotten. The sun was almost gone, a slight orange tint visible only through the trees in the distance.

He panicked a little and sat upright. Shun shot him a glance in the near darkness, concerned.

"It's really late," he observed, already wishing he'd come sooner (already forgetting the reason why he'd been late getting here).

"How else can you watch a sunset?" he quipped, pointing past the bushes and towards the silver birches in the distance where the remnants of sunlight still hid.

Sora was still a little worried, despite Shun's confident tone. "We will do this again, right?" he asked, shooting him a concerned look. "I mean there's so much I want to talk to you about."

Shun squeezed his hand tighter.

"Definitely," he smiled assuredly.

A content silence formed between the two, the only noise being the occasional buzz from Sora's duel disk as Yuya frantically texted him asking for updates.

He held it up so Shun could see the messages and they both shared a laugh before Sora slid it off his wrist and placed it beside him.

He leaned back against Shun and looked out across the pond, the two boys staring in wonder as the last rays of sunlight wilfully receded behind the curvature of a stunning, tree-laden horizon.


	8. Nightmares

Chapter 8: Nightmares

Sora was nervous.

It had been less than twenty-four hours since he'd waved goodbye to Shun for the evening, and already he had the feeling he'd made a huge mistake with how he was handling their newly cultivated relationship.

The problem lay with what had happened, or rather what he'd proposed, last night. Before they had parted ways after strolling through the darkness together in an uneasy silence, Sora had rather impulsively asked him whether he'd want to visit the next day.

Shun had agreed, albeit apprehensively.

Sora would have (and should have) been ecstatic at the prospect of seeing him again, especially after what had happened at the pond, but something inside of him was telling him that he was pushing it too hard.

They were both broken, fragile individuals, and although Sora knew exactly where he was at in terms of how he was dealing with the (extremely) novel concept of a relationship, he had no idea how Shun felt.

Yes, he'd admitted to liking him and wanting to spend more time with him, but was he ready to see him so soon and on such unfamiliar ground?

Sora felt like he'd rushed straight into it. They should have talked about how they were going to do this, especially with regard to how they were going to try to manage their time. When he'd asked Shun he put him in a position where he just couldn't say no even if he'd wanted to. After all, he wouldn't have wanted to disappoint Sora.

And so, here Sora was, waiting by the door for his arrival.

He was sat on the bottom step of the stairs, the front door directly in his line of sight. He drummed his fingers on the wood of the banister in anticipation of the bell, wondering how Shun was going to react to being in such new environment.

Sora knew he had the home field advantage, but he was still nervous nonetheless. This would be their second meeting since the end of the war (not counting their first encounter of little to no words) so it was bound to be awkward at first… right?

He thought they'd done well with their meeting at the pond, but a lot of their conversation was focused on their confessions, which admittedly had given them both a boost in confidence at the time.

As Sora pondered on the art of conversation, lost in his thoughts, the doorbell suddenly rang.

Jumping up in shock, he clasped his hand around the door handle and pulled the door open, all in one swift motion. So swift in fact, Shun hadn't even had time to remove his finger from the doorbell.

Sora smiled at him awkwardly, his cheeks burning as he realised that he may have looked a little too eager.

"Hi." He gave him a small wave as he stood in the doorway, trying to avoid his gaze.

"Sora," he replied, offering no wave but a small smile instead.

"Urrm come in, please." He ushered him inside and closed the door behind him.

They stood, shoulder to shoulder in the tiny hallway by the stairs, neither daring to speak.

Before it could become anymore awkward, Sora set off up the stairs, gesturing for Shun to follow. Once they'd reached the top, they continued on towards his room.

The door already ajar, Sora pushed it open and led Shun inside.

After shutting it behind them he stood facing Shun, who was stood idly in the centre of the room. He eventually turned to him and spoke, his voice filled with confusion and uncertainty. "Um where should I sit?" he asked, looking around the room.

"Oh crap," Sora realised, "I forgot to grab Yuya's beanbags before you came… sorry." He scratched the back of his head nervously.

"Erm… should I…?" Shun gestured towards his bed, embarrassment seeping into his cheeks as they turned a light shade of pink.

"Ye-Yeah sure… sorry about that." Sora nodded and smiled.

"It's fine," Shun said plainly, climbing onto Sora's bed and sitting with his back to the wall, boots dangling off the edge.

 _Not a good start_.

Sora tentatively made his way over and sat facing Shun (who was side on to him) from the top of the bed. He pulled his knees up to his chest and curled into a sort of ball.

Shun shifted slightly and crossed his arms. Sora could tell he was uncomfortable.

His eyes were darting around the room, frantically trying to take it all in. Eventually his gaze fell upon the mounds of soft toys stacked in the corner of the room and stayed there.

"Old habits…" Sora offered, noticing where his attention was focused.

Shun grunted in acknowledgement, before letting his gaze finally rest upon the tips of his boots.

Minutes passed with neither of them talking, the silence between them growing ever more awkward.

Sora eventually re-crossed his legs and put his head in his hands.

 _This was definitely not going well_.

He needed to say something.

Taking a deep breath, he uncovered his face and spoke. "Look Shun… I'm really sorry that I asked you to do this so soon, I know it's not easy… you have to understand though I was just excited after talking yesterday, I didn't mean to rush you into anything."

Shun turned to look at him, a little fear hidden behind his golden eyes. "I know," he answered, nodding slightly. "I-I just find this sort of thing hard that's all."

"So do I… but we can work on it together?" Sora offered hopefully.

Shun nodded. "I'd like that."

Sora smiled his warmest smile. "Good! So what should we talk about…?" he asked himself, his voice trailing off as he began to think of a subject for conversation.

"How about your bears?" Shun offered quietly, gesturing across the room.

"Sure!" Sora smiled, involuntarily stretching his legs out as he readied himself to go show off his collection. As he did so however, he accidently brushed Shun with the tip of his foot, causing the older boy to recoil in response, bringing his knees up to his chest immediately.

"I'm really sorry Shun," Sora frantically protested, distressed that he had somehow caused him discomfort.

"It's fine, it's fine," Shun breathed, "it's just… I'm… I'm not good with touching."

Confused, Sora shifted so he was sat against the wall like Shun, his feet barely reaching the edge of the bed. He didn't understand it, all Sora wanted to do was to feel the warmth of Shun's touch, so why didn't he want to do the same? Yesterday he'd been more than willing to do so, he'd even been the one to hold his hand.

"Okay I understand," Sora accepted. "But what about yesterday?"

"At the pond I feel more… relaxed. The whole place just makes me calmer, like it's the complete opposite of you know… how it used to be."

Sora nodded along, Shun's words all but confirming his worry that having their first post-confession meeting at his house was a bad idea.

"I know you don't want to hear this…" he whispered, hanging his head slightly in apology.

"Shun it's okay… talk to me," Sora pleaded, resisting the urge to physically show him his support. "It's the only way we can get through this, together."

Shun breathed a heavy sigh. "Okay… it's the way it was back then… the war I mean… that's made me this way… it started right after V-Day." He turned to look at Sora, a painful sorrow brewing beneath the surface of his normally sparkling eyes. "At first it was just little things, like getting angry for no reason or snapping at Ruri… But after a while I started becoming paranoid, thinking people were staring at me too long or that my room was being bugged by Fusion agents. It got even worse about a year ago with all that Neo-Fusion stuff in the Xyz Dimension… I stopped trusting people… Yuto, Ruri, everyone."

He closed his eyes and dropped his shoulders in an attempt to calm himself. "And that's how I've been ever since…"

Sora blinked away a tear and swallowed the lump in his throat before Shun opened his eyes. His feelings were so relatable and familiar, but they held a particular sadness that really touched Sora when he knew they were being expressed by Shun.

"I've felt something similar…" he whispered, desperately wanting to grab hold of Shun's hand. "For the last two years I haven't been able to make friends with anyone, or even talk to anyone besides Yuya for that matter… The war bled me of my confidence, a few months after it and I was on my own. I hid myself away until Yuya found me, but even that didn't change things. I felt alone, isolated… like no-one knew what was going on inside my head."

It was Shun's turn to swallow hard. His left hand twitched, and he lifted it slightly off the bed, his fingers trembling as he did so.

Sora noticed and looked at him expectantly. "Can I…?" he whispered, lifting his own hand and moving it closer.

Shun nodded slowly. Sora took his permission and gently rested his hand on top of Shun's shaking knuckles, slowly pressing his hand down to the mattress.

Shun was breathing anxiously, but Sora tried to give him a look that told him it was all going to be alright.

After a few minutes his breaths became more relaxed, but his uneasy expression remained the same. "Sora," he murmured, "do you… do you have nightmares still?"

Sora curled his fingers around his hand and squeezed firmly. "Sometimes, but not as often as I used to… do you…?"

"Every night," Shun replied, his body visibly tensing. "I can't shake them, no matter how hard I try or whatever pills I take… I-I just can't."

Sora was hesitant. "What… What are they about?"

"What happened in Heartland mostly…" He screwed his hand into a tight fist, leaving Sora's smaller hand resting helplessly on top of it. "I'm usually running through the streets, being chased down by Obelisk Force. I don't have my duel disk, and all around me I see people trapped in the rubble. I see… Yuto… and Ruri… they're screaming for me to help them… but I can't, I'm… I'm too afraid. Eventually they corner me, and as I'm being carded, as the lights on their disks flash white, I wake up."

"That's… awful." Sora couldn't think of any other words to describe it. What Shun was going through… it was a hell of a lot worse than he thought. "Have you tried to get help?"

"Yuto made me about a year ago, but it didn't work."

"Oh… I'm so sorry Shun. Maybe… Maybe there's something else you can try out there."

"I doubt it." Shun looked forlorn, until he surprised Sora with a weak smile. "But this… this has helped."

Sora couldn't help but feel a sense of pride as Shun's tightly wound fist receded until his hand was flat again.

"Talking about these things makes them easier I think," Sora concluded, "and just having someone there for you, it's… what _I've_ needed and I think it's what you need too."

Shun nodded and smiled slightly.

His face quickly turned a bright shade of red as he reached into his pocket and dug out an old mobile phone. "Erm Sora… would it be okay if I had your number? I'd feel better for it, knowing you're there."

"Sure," Sora smiled back warmly, pulling open his bedside drawer and removing an equally outdated phone.

They exchanged numbers, and were left in a content silence similar to that that they'd shared as they watched the sunset the day before.

The silence was soon broken however by a shout from downstairs.

"Sora! Should I put an extra plate out for your friend, dinner's going to be early today!"

It was Yoko.

Shun nearly jumped out of his skin, and Sora could immediately see the terror in his eyes. He wasn't ready for this.

"Urghhh no it's okay! It was only a quick visit!" Sora shouted back. He watched the relief pass over Shun as his shoulders relaxed and his expression softened.

"Thank you," he whispered, dropping his feet to the floor and standing upright.

Sora just smiled and made his way to the door. Before he opened it however, he took a step to the side and reached into the pile of toys in the corner of the room, picking up a small blue bear. It had a scruffy and bedraggled look, but its fur was soft and fluffy, nearly obscuring its tiny black eyes completely.

He held it out to Shun as he was about to leave. "Shun, I don't know if this will help, but I always found it comforting to have beside me in the early days… I know you're like nineteen years old and bears aren't exactly your thing, but it could help with the nightmares."

Shun's face flared up again and he blinked rapidly at Sora's offering, embarrassed and surprised at the gesture.

"I-urgh…"

"You don't have to use it if you don't want to," Sora assured him, "just take it and put it somewhere, then it's like a piece of me will always be there to help you."

Sora had no idea where his confidence had come from. It had happened yesterday, and now it was happening today. For some reason around Shun he felt that once they'd broken the ice and come to an understanding, he could talk to him almost like he was his best friend. He wanted them to be just that and _more_ , but it was going to take them both helping each other out to achieve that, and Sora was more than happy to be the one to instigate that if it meant they grew closer.

"Umm, okay," Shun finally agreed after much deliberating. He took the bear from Sora and stashed it away under his coat, blushing furiously as he did so.

Sora smiled and opened the door, leading Shun downstairs. Once they'd reached the front door, Shun let himself out and turned to face Sora, who stood in the doorway.

"I guess I'll see you later," he waved, the bulge of the bear evident under his coat.

"I'm sorry we had to cut this short," Sora apologised, remembering that they'd only seen each other for barely fifteen minutes.

"It's okay…" Shun turned and started to walk before stopping and glancing over his shoulder. "…Can I text you?"

"Sure," Sora smiled back.

Shun nodded, and with a swish of his trench coat he began to walk until he disappeared around the corner.

Sora shut the door, but not a second later, he felt a sharp buzz in his pocket. Pulling out his old phone and checking the alert, he smiled to himself and pulled it into his chest.

 _I enjoyed today. I'm sorry if I didn't look it._

 _P.S. Thanks for the bear._


End file.
